I carried the weight of my £60,000 debt alone. Then one conversation changed everything

Kate McCavana, 55, who lives in Cornwall, struggled with debt after external forces wrecked her business. Here, she tells her story.

By 2022, I had become so overwhelmed by financial stress and shame that I couldn’t see a way forward. There were moments when it felt impossible to keep going. Suicidal thoughts. Weeks lost to deep depressions. 

But looking back, I can see that those darkest times weren’t the end of my story – they were the beginning of a profound transformation.

This journey began in 2016 when my thriving business – focused on coaching and securing European grants – was wiped out almost overnight by Brexit. The ripple effect was instant. Clients vanished. Income streams dried up. I was left with commitments, expenses and a life I had carefully built now hanging by a thread.

Like many mothers, I’d invested heavily in my children’s growth and opportunities, stretching myself to fund extracurriculars and experiences I believed would serve their future. My husband and I had always held different views on spending, and rather than facing difficult conversations with him, I took it upon myself to keep things running as smoothly as possible. 

When my income disappeared in 2016, I did what so many do: I borrowed, hoping it was a short-term fix.

Get the latest news and insight into how the Big Issue magazine is made by signing up for the Inside Big Issue newsletter

At the same time, I was juggling multiple roles: mother, business owner, carer to my mum as she battled Parkinson’s and later dementia. The pressure was relentless and it took its toll on my marriage. I kept everything going in survival mode, believing I could turn things around before my marriage died on the vine and anyone else had to bear the weight of my struggles.

I did rebuild. I adapted my business and began paying off debt. 

But then, Covid struck. 

My income collapsed again, this time alongside my husband’s. Like so many who were self-employed, our family was hit on every front. Both of my daughters became unwell with eating disorders and I used every resource I had to get them the help they needed when the NHS couldn’t.  

It didn’t matter that I was already in debt. When you’re a parent, you do whatever it takes.

• Where to get free financial advice now – from benefits to budgeting
• Covid left me thousands of pounds in debt – I was suicidal. Here’s how I turned things around
• Crisis-proofing your finances: How to prepare for the unexpected with an emergency fund

By 2021, I was in £60,000 of debt, still trying to hold it all together. I had kept so much of this hidden, believing I had to carry it alone. But the truth was, the more I hid, the more suffocating it got. The more I felt like I was drowning with no lifebelt in sight.     

Everything changed with one simple conversation.

In January 2023, an Office of National Statistics survey came through our door, offering £25 to households who participated. I signed up, not thinking much of it. But during the interview, when I was asked directly about my finances and the actual figures, something cracked open. 

For the first time, I spoke the full truth about the mess I’d created in front of both a stranger and my husband. 

The interviewer burst into tears because he could feel the pain I was in. My husband burst into tears because he finally understood why I’d been suffering with dark suicidal thoughts and dark days all this time.  

In that moment, the weight I’d been carrying alone for years was finally shared.

That conversation was the bravest thing I have ever done. It changed everything.

From there, I reached out to Money Wellness as suggested by the ONS interviewer, who helped me create a debt management plan. For the first time in years, I wasn’t drowning. I had a clear, structured way forward.  

My husband and I began navigating our finances together, and the shame I had once carried started to dissolve.

And as my nervous system calmed, so did my ability to see the bigger picture. 

When I stopped running on stress and survival, I was able to rebuild – not just my business but my entire relationship with money, self-worth and success.  

The biggest lesson I’ve learned? Financial stress is never just about money. It’s about shame. It’s about self-worth. It’s about the heart-to-heart conversations that aren’t being had. 

The silent battles we fight, believing that we have to do it alone. But we don’t.  

Debt isn’t a life sentence. It doesn’t define your worth, your intelligence, or your ability to thrive. The moment we release the shame around it, everything shifts.

I’ve not only rebuilt my business, I’ve reclaimed my power. My work today is about supporting others in breaking free from the old paradigms of stress, struggle and self-sacrifice. Because true financial freedom isn’t just about numbers, it’s about stepping into full alignment with who you are and how you’re here to serve.

This story doesn’t end in crisis. It ends in clarity, transformation and a deep knowing that no matter how impossible things feel, there is always a way forward.

Do you have a story to tell or opinions to share about this? Get in touch and tell us more. Big Issue exists to give homeless and marginalised people the opportunity to earn an income. To support our work buy a copy of the magazine or get the app from the App Store or Google Play.