Game of Thrones season 8? I’m out with a nasty case of Dragon Fatigue

The final season of Game of Thrones has been the most anticipated TV event of the year. But this time Lucy Sweet just isn’t biting

You can go off people, can’t you? Once they made your heart race, you couldn’t wait to see them again and they were all you ever talked about. Now, though, well…they’re getting on your nerves, they might actually be a bit boring, and do you really need them in your life at all? And what on earth are they WEARING?

This, it turns out, can happen with TV shows, too. There was a time when the ‘dum dum duh de dum dum’ theme tune of Game of Thrones both set me all a-flutter and put me instantly on red alert, like Father Jack when he heard La Marseillaise. What hideous depravity would old George RR Martin think of next? How did Cersei get her hair like that without access to really expensive conditioner?

All I knew was I could cosy up with a goblet of wine and watch some nasty Machiavellian schemes,

There were ravens delivering portentous scrolls, there was King Joffrey, there was that quite frankly over-the-top fire woman, and there was the Hound. There was even Diana Rigg. Most of all, there was this other driving force called momentum, which kept everything barrelling along no matter whether they were doing battle in Westeros or battering white walkers north of the wall. Half the time, I didn’t know where on the completely made-up map I was, who was possessed by what, and whose armies were whose, andI didn’t care. All I knew was I could cosy up with a goblet of wine and watch some nasty Machiavellian schemes and maybe the odd undulating butt cheek.

But I’m just not feeling it any more and I can’t put my finger on it. Maybe it’s Bran, the Buzz Killington of Winterfell. Maybe I’m suffering from that little-known condition called Dragon Fatigue. Or maybe I’m just not digging the new King and Queen of the North. When they’re standing together, with their flowing hair and their silly bits of fur, they look like they’re going to start singing the Katie Price and Peter Andre version of A Whole New World. Or could it be because I’ve stopped caring about the characters, even when they’re doing fun stuff like waving swords and losing their virginity?

But I’m not prepared to pack it in yet. I’m still keen to give it a go. Relationship counselling, CBT, date nights, I’ll do what it takes to keep us together, but it’s all about give and take. I’m hoping that all the ominous chat about death will lead to some heart-stopping action soon. Something that’s the equivalent of finding a diamond ring in your crème brûlée. I’m praying for a full-on Seven Kingdoms battle where everyone turns into a zombie and they’re sucked into a time portal, arriving in modern-day New York to battle the Avengers. Come on, GoT, help me out. Otherwise I’m going to have to leave you for The Walking Dead.

The eighth and final season of Game Of Thrones is currently showing on Sky Atlantic