'My dad died hiding a gambling addiction and homelessness. I wish he had let us help him'

Michelle’s father never told anyone about his gambling addiction. He faced debt and homelessness, but he kept it quiet from his family and isolated himself from friends. 

“Ultimately, he died not telling anyone,” she says. “I think if he had felt less judged about it, less shame about it, he would have been able to come forward and seek support for it and told friends and family. Maybe he still would have been alive today.” 

It is well-proven that gambling can lead to bankruptcy and housing problems, with one study from the University of Cambridge finding that people facing homelessness are 10 times more likely to be problem gamblers than the general UK population. 

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For years, Michelle believed that her father was living in Portugal and running a vineyard, but the reality was that he was experiencing homelessness. He was sleeping in a friend’s garden in a tent for years. 

“In the last three years before he died, I knew he was staying at a friend’s house and camping in her back garden, but I only thought it was for a couple of months whilst he was getting a flat through social housing,” Michelle recalls. 

He eventually secured a council home, but he lived in poor conditions and his health was deteriorating.

“He’d put on a lot of weight, so he was morbidly obese. I didn’t really know what was going on with him health wise. I saw that rapid deterioration and I never really knew why,” says Michelle. 

“It was really difficult to try and help him. He cut himself off from all his friends. I never knew the extent of what actually happened. I found all of that out after his death.” 

Michelle’s father died days after her wedding. In subsequent months, she discovered letters from bailiffs and long-standing debts. His bank accounts revealed a pattern of gambling going back years, and there was no evidence that he had lived in Portugal. 

“He kept up the lie because I think that was his ambition,” Michelle says. “In fact, he was living for nearly four or five years in a friend’s back garden in England, camping, and no one knew. He cut off his friends because he was so ashamed.” 

Around 1.4 million adults in the UK experience problem gambling, according to the Gambling Commission. 

Of people who gambled in 2025, only 3.4% sought support because of their gambling.  

Meanwhile, one in 10 people close to someone who gambles reported feelings of guilt or shame connected to gambling. 

Michelle says she believes the stigmas around gambling, addiction and homelessness led her father to hide his situation. 

“I can’t think of anything else other than kind of him feeling that deep sense of shame. He was a very proud person,” she says. “I think because it relates to money, people don’t talk about it enough.” 

By speaking out about her story, Michelle hopes to encourage others to share their experiences and seek help. 

“People often only reach out for help or think they need help when they’ve got to breaking point or rock bottom. If that intervention can happen a lot earlier, it can help people a lot more,” Michelle says. 

Along with her sister, Michelle has committed to running 62 miles this year in honour of the 62 years of her father’s life to raise money for gambling charity Ygam, which educates young people about the dangers of gambling. 

“Michelle’s story is a powerful reminder of how stigma can exacerbate gambling harms,” says Emily Tofield, chief executive of Ygam. “Education is one of the most effective tools we have to help prevent gambling harms. 

“Stigma remains one of the biggest barriers preventing young people and families from seeking support. Shame and silence too often stop people reaching out until a crisis point.” 

Michelle echoes Ygam’s calls for more education around gambling and addiction to eradicate the shame and stigma that people feel. This education could save lives. 

“I didn’t understand addiction at all until after my dad’s death and I think having that education and understanding, retrospectively now, I actually may have been able to recognise more of the signs than I did when he was alive,” Michelle says. 

“I think if I knew some of the signs, if people talked about it more, maybe it would have sparked those conversations that I could have had with my dad and he might have opened up.” 

Michelle’s sister Emma will be raising money for YGam, taking on her ninth race at September’s Barnstaple Marathon. Head here to donate.

Do you have a story to tell or opinions to share about this? Get in touch and tell us more. 

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